The word comprehensive


The guy the Republicans hired to win the election likes two things: libertarianism and the word “comprehensive.”

The libertarian part is easy to understand. It was Trumps way of telling God’s Own Prohibitionists that he could hand them government jobs or hand them another beating–the same way Ross Perot got George Holy War Bush fired.

But my favorite Soviet website (we will Doonesbury you), recently took issue with the word comprehensive. After JFK negotiated the Limited Test Ban to keep strontium 90 out of children’s milk, communist intellectuals sought to puff comprehensive up into the entering wedge for unilaterally disarming the USA. That ran aground on the Second Amendment. So after the Soviet bloc collapsed like a Berlin Wall or US Embassy in Saigon, “comprehensive” went out of fashion. This graph shows the decline and fall of the word “comprehensive” before Trump.

Look into my eyes...

Go ahead, try it yourself

This we know from Wolfram Alpha, a collection of programmers who appreciate math AND language. The graph shows a falloff in stock (quotes, usage) for comprehensive dating from about the time the looters started mothballing their tens of thousands of fusion bombs after the failure of The Altrurian Experiment in the crumbling Soviet Empire. So, why is this important?

The current president got the nomination ten months after saying something nice about a burgeoning minor party. Four months later he was President and Libertarian Party stock (in votes) was up 328%. If comprehensive is welcomed back into the vernacular, its reformation glittering over its faults, that would suggest there is some truth to “master of hypnosis” theories for Trump being elected.

If it doesn’t, the fact would lend weight to the theory that infiltrators in the Democratic party platform committee threw the election by injecting the platform with pseudoscience depicting reliable electric power plants as a life-threatening plague. This was the way all US power generation facilities were depicted during the Brezhnev, Andropov, Chernenko, Gorbachev and Yanayev dictatorships. The 2016 Republican platform also broke ranks with Prohibition Party’s ecological nationalsocialism planks of 2016:

We advocate… subsidies for consumers wishing to change from fossil fuels to renewable domestic sources of energy.
We believe that climatic change is an existential threat to civilization.

The Gee Oh Pee urinalysis platform trashed carbon taxes, promised to toss the Paris Capitulation into the same dustbin as the Kyoto Proctocol. The platform protects power plants and fuel from fanatical fearmongers, and even improves transmission line infrastructure.

The Libertarian party platform is also in favor of access to energy. Here is the LP energy plank in its clear and unambiguous entirety:

While energy is needed to fuel a modern society, government should not be subsidizing any particular form of energy. We oppose all government control of energy pricing, allocation, and production.

Can you say Hockey Stick?

WANTED: Fisher-Pry least-squares curve fit for these burgeoning vote counts

But what of that hockey-stick growth in Libertarian spoiler votes? Did the LP suddenly become popular because a real-estate mesmerist admitted to liking libertarianism? Perhaps it was because the recycled Republican candidate the LP resorted to abandoned his 2012 promise to try to bring back the coathanger abortion laws struck down by the reincarnation of the 1972 LP birth control plank as the lead paragraph in the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade decision. Is there a third hypothesis? Perhaps the American voter is discovering that the less you try to coerce others, the less others will respond in that particular kind.

Do you ever need simultaneous interpretation of a speech, or sight translation of a legal document?

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