Duterte to replace Sessions


As usual, rumors are everywhere that El Presidente is about to fire or replace someone. And yet barely two centuries ago such rumors in Europe were about a ruler preparing to burn or behead someone. That’s Progress. But Beauregard Sessions is more than a reproach. The Alabama bigot is a return to George Wallace partisans keeping “dark people” in their place–much as satirized in Mr. Dooley and George Orwell’s “Burmese Days.” So why not enlist experienced help for prohibition enforcement?

“Our number’s up.** Best thing we can do is to shut up shop and let ’em stew in their own juice,” remarked Senator Grassley (R-IA).

“I don’t agree, I simply don’t agree,” Senatrix Feinstein replied. “We could put things right in a month if we chose. It only needs a pennyworth of pluck. Look at Amritsar. Look how they caved in after that. Dyer knew the stuff to give them. Poor old Dyer! That was a dirty job. Those cowards at the UN have got something to answer for.”

There was a kind of sigh from the others, the same sigh that a gathering of Roman Catholics will give at the mention of Bloody Mary. Even Mr Trump, who detested bloodshed and martial law, shook his head at the name of Dyer.

“Ah, poor man! Sacrificed to the liberals at the UN. Well, perhaps they will discover their mistake when it is too late.” “What about this fellow Duterte? Might he be a replacement for Mr. Magoo?”

** With apologies to Eric Arthur Blair–son of British Sub-Deputy Opium Agent Second-class, –and author of “Burmese Days.”

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